COUNCIL TO HIRE HEADHUNTERS

CRUMBRIA: 29/07/2025:

By Tom Fool

WOKEMORELAND & Farcical Council will brandish the Taxpayer cheque book next month to find a new chief executive to replace the soon-to-retire Sam Plum (Job).

I’m reliably informed that the free-spending Lib Dem dictatorship plans to hire an expensive “specialist recruitment agency”.

They’ll take on out-of-county corporate headhunters who scroll LinkedIn for a living and schmooze candidates while holding the Council’s hands through the trauma of picking a new chief.

Previous stunts like this by councils in Crumbria have set the public kitty back by sums not unadjacent to £30,000.

It’s also emerged that the chief exec’s current salary is a whopping £188,000 – up from £183,000 – following April’s 3.2% pay “uplift”.

As we’ve said before: How on earth is a rural Council boss paid more for running the authority than the PM is for running the country?

And why are political opposition parties on the Council just sitting back and shrugging at this instead of playing merry hell?

Another ridiculous hoop the Council intends to make applicants jump through is submitting them to “psychometric” testing.

You’d think they were hiring an astronaut to go into space!

Presumably, these tests are to ensure that the new boss has the personality of an Excel spreadsheet.

Also, some candidates will have to endure a two-day assessment centre. The council’s Inhumane Resources looks like it’s trying to turn a straightforward process into death by vol-eu-vents!

Once again, Council Taxpayers in Barrow, Kendal and Penrith are having their pants pulled down with the public sector largesse.

As the Taxpayers’ Alliance have said: “Town hall pay is out of control.”